Deponia Internet AU
Navigation:
Characters and their profiles:
Dome of Disaster:
Their Relationship: Basically Rufus, Cletus and Argus being roommates with Hermes occupying the attic. Depending on how you want to read their relationships, they could be brothers with Hermes being their dad, clones and their creator, a weird love-triangle with a done landlord or friends with a slightly mad landlord - all up to you!
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A disaster a.k.a. DIY youtuber. Is a technic nerd but does not understand basic physics. It's great. Has the ambulance on speed-dial. Uploads every week; always has a band-aid, a bandage or smt similar on. No one knows how he survived this long. 3/4 of his vids are just him getting wrecked bc his project of the week backfires. When it works, he has no idea how he managed to do that but will claim he knows what he does. Was in everyone's yt rec with a vid of him trying to build a gaming chair that tasers you when you die for his roommates who's a gaming streamer (cAn YoU GueSS In wHaT DIRectIoN tHaT Is GoINg? Noooo, ofc not, STaY TuneD) but just fu**ed up the quarter's electricity.
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Gaming streamer. Isn't that famous until one day his lizard jumps up on his lap and he nearly breaks his keyboard cuz he was playing Outlast; afterward gains a lot of attention. Plays lots of horror games bc his community loves to see him suffer. He loves his donations, so suffer he does. Acts as if he doesn't care but reads out every sub's name and donation and always says thank you. Mama (he means Hermes. Hermes is Team Mom. I'll come back to it later, I swear) didn't raise some impolite jerk, thank you vewy much! Will DM his regulars if he doesn't hear from them in a long while but psh, don't tell the world - he is a sensitive flower and cannot even if people were to find out he has... feeling (uh, disgusting). Sometimes drinks wine and starts philosophizing while sniping away at zombies. Also, no one asked for his make-up tutorials or his snarky commentary but everyone stays for it. And for his thot-ness.
- Cletus' fav streaming music: Todrick Hall - I like Boys (tough he likes everything from him, tbh)
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Fitness influencer. The fittest of the fit. He flexes and his shirt is gone. Is sponsored by Organon™Fit and will try to get it into every conversation. His whole insta feed is just him in the gym or in a new car. Comments are thirsty for this boiiii. He loves the attention. His account gets all the attention bc he bench pressed like a whole tree trunk bc his roommates dared him to. His fitness plan is longer than some ppl's dissertation and he is proud of it. Thinks about maybe making his own fashion line with shirts that don't rip the second he flexes his muscles but still brings out his hulk-ness. Promised to bench press his two roommates and do push-ups with his dad on his back when he reaches 1M followers. Ppl think he himbo but he like a greek god - smart boi, buff boi, good boi.
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High as a kite. First things first. No one can agree whether he's a genius or a madman who needs help. Just streaming but uploads uncut versions of it on his yt channel. Nearly always talks about scientific mysteries/paradoxes/future possibility (once streamed life, talking about cloning and also scribbled stuff related to it on some whiteboards. Suddenly stopped mid-writing, grew very still and called the stream off. Never talked about cloning again and ignores questions in the chat related to it). Sometimes has a friendly discussion on twitter with Doc about some physics topic that can only be followed by like, two more people. Supports the three trash bois though no one knows how he knows them or why bc they're either not in the same subjects as he is (Argus and Cletus) or basically goes against anything even a half-arsed scientist stands for (I'm looking at you Rufus. Stop making Gizmo cry and Doc age - lord knows the man doesn't have that much left anyway). His age cannot be figured out. Might be twenty, might be sixty, might be dead already. The Internet has given it many tries and concluded that Hermes is, in fact, a timeless entity.
- probably digs Hollywood Undead
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FandomFighters:
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Only one who knows what a cosplay is without turning it into a slut competition (I'm looking at Cletus here, ngl). Makes vids where she shows you how to make your own cosplays and put on your makeup for it. Also rates conventions for their cosplayer-friendliness. Is rumoured to have/had something with Cletus. Has a second channel on yt where she uploads Let's plays. Also supports all other of our guuuuurls in this AU but isn't that keen on getting into twitter feuds additionally to all her cosplay making (stuff takes time, I gotta tell u) but will speak up if stuff is important. The one to suggest to Cletus to play more horror games. Second most ship with her is with Toni. Only one in the whole cast who can bear to read fanfics about herself out loud. Streams with Barry sometimes to give him some input on his fanfics. Reminds her subs/followers/fans to take care of themselves and get help if they have problems.
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Allow me to introduce you to our incarnation in this whole AU, gentlepeople! He is a fanboy. Started with Rufus, then quickly evolved to Cletus and Argus too. Makes best-of's off Rufus getting burned and Cletus screaming. Maybe simps for Argus? At least the best-ofs have that vibe. But generally is just a precious fanboy who supports the three trash bois and also everyone else. Writes fanfics and doodles in his streams, also deals out advice to any newbies to any of the fanbases. Is the first one to call out the similarities between ACR and comes up with some explanations for it (One includes cloning - AND ISN'T THAT RIDICULOUS LIKE TF BARRY, THAT CAN'T BE THE ANSWER; OBSLY?!?!). Isn't too well with respecting boundaries but backs off when told to. Is appreciated by all the bois in various ways - becomes Cletus main mod for streams, cutter for Rufus' vids and responsible for Argus' captions to his insta posts - he is in fanboy heaven and loves life. Everyone else loves him too.
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Da Network:
Note: Technically, Goal belongs here too but I didn't include her into this group so Barry isn't lonely.
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Barely any internet presence. Mostly stays in the background. Is a networker/manager so only really has a website where he introduces his network and the influencer within his network. Always out there searching for new members. Partly owning Organon™Fit and is about one new product placement and a business lunch away from getting Argus to sign the contract. Tries to get Cletus on board too, is cautious with Rufus bc he really doesn't want to pay the bills for his hospital stays and the repairs. Is rumoured to work together with Seagull and also have stocks with Seagull's companies but nothing concrete came up yet. Seems to be a good manager. Has a private insta account where he posts pics from his and his daughter's (I'm talking Goal here, as you all probably figured out by now) holiday trips. Is a good dad.
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It's ur man, Cowboy Dodo - best singer 'round town! At least that's his catchphrase. Kind of like the Wendler? (u germans know what I mean) but less of a jerk. Has overpriced merch but his stuff still sells out. Wet dream of all them teen girls. Sings country and denies to his dying day that this one rap album with this one featuring artist called M.C. C.D. was him. Is part of Ulysess' network (we come back to it later, kay?). Has most followers on insta and makes like, eight stories a day about his food/beauty routine/... and sometimes forgets to tag product placements.
- song that he once listened to and had to stop for a few hours with whatever he was doing because it hit too close to home; only day since he started with his internet presence that he didn't make a single insta story: The Neighbourhood - Wires.
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Team Dad:
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Also a DIY yt but has two (2) PhDs. Makes vids where he builds like photocopiers out of junk and microwaves out of a washing machine but also scams scammers and answers questions about stuff like problems with your PC and stuff like that. Was asked to react to Rufus' vids and nearly got an aneurysm screaming at the screen why that's a stupid idea and why it actually did work. Once did a drinking challenge out of it - every time Rufus said something wrong - and had to stop after two minutes into the vid bc he's kinda fond of his liver. Now regularly reacts to Rufus and ages about eight years every time he turns on the damn cam. Is done but pulls strength from his patreons and his good friend Gizmo who is crying every time Rufus uploads bc "WhAt AbOuT SaFeTy GuIdElInEs?!?!??".
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He just... idk, man, he just tries so hard, okay??? Half of his vids are about first aid and what to do in x situation, the other half is him calling attention to important projects and funding pages after catastrophes, like an earthquake in poor countries or smt like that. Features in vids with Doc where he either tells ppl why Doc needs to do it this way to stay safe or reacts with him to Rufus' vids. If Doc ages watching them, Gizmo dies while watching. Also talks about his time as a paramedic within Doctors Without Borders before he was honorably discharged after he was diagnosed with PTSD. Is soft and will call you out if you are a meanie. Also, the best mediator and no one ever dares to speak up if he breaks up a shitstorm or things like that bc the whole internet agrees that this man is Good.
- Song that goes on loop everytime Gizmo had a flashback: Dead Pirates - Ugo.
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Shared Sanctuary for Feminity:
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Pro for weapons. Knifes, guns, forks - you name it. Men are terrified, women are scared and lesbians are fucking here for it. Can name 100 ways to hurt you and will not stand for people who haven't drunken their respect-women-juice, esp when it comes to Lotti. Everyone is surprised when she tells them she has a boyfriend. And are even more surprised to find out it's Bozo - bc Bozo is soft. Makes collabs with Lotti and Toni and has announced publically that she will fight Seagull if he continues to be such a jerk. He continues - and she prepares. Probably a veteran.
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Gets some god darn recognition but deserves even more. Has a blog about feminism and a "most-misogynistic-X" list that gets updated every month. Has one for important internet personalities, countries and organizations. Gets simped but respectfully. Where Lotti is the icon for trans ppl and Bambina for everyone who has self-respect, Toni is the patron of all of the women. Makes appeals for donations for women's shelters and other institutions that help women, esp victims of domestic abuse. Also starts multiple feuds with ppl like J.K.R. and Seagull but is too smart to be defeated so basically just roasts ppl with her iconic attitude of "I-am-so-done-and-have-been-so-since-my-birth-so-really-you-cannot-bother-me-in-any-way-that-matters". Has been rumoured to be/had been in a relationship with Rufus.
- because of the vibe and topic of this song: Green Grey feat. Григорий Лепс - Бабосы Боссам/Green Grey feat. Grigory Leps - Boss'es Money.
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Ur girl for them makeup tutorials. Can tell you everything, from how to straighten your hair to how to figure out the perfect eyeliner. Her community made a go-fund-me page for her gender reassignment (lives in the U.S. of frigging A. ... should consider moving to the EU bc shit's free here). Raised the money in like, three days. Is the icon for all girls and trans ppl. Collabs with Bambina about sports and with Toni about Spa days. The first one to have an onlyfans account. Will block and report u if u do not respect women/minorities/lgbtq+ - nvm whether it's her comment section or someone else's. Gets into heated twitter discussion once a month with terfs. Once started a shitstorm about J.K.R. (Juán Karlos Raúling. Why am I like this?) who said women who don't menstruate aren't women. Ready to slap up a bitch (I'm talking about Seagull here) if he doesn't drop his sexist comments.
- Fav song: The Neighbourhood - Sweater Weather.
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Ocean Men:
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Sailor. Quiet. Nature is life, nature is good. Nature is love, like his girlfriend. Quiet and very calm man. If you can't sleep, turn on either his vids where he talks about his travels at sea or look whether he's live-streaming one of his trips on his ship or, if you're really lucky, he's fishing! Might do a collab with Doc where they fix up their old ship and supports Gizmo's shoutouts for sea-related fundings. Can be asked about any topic, will always provide great advice. He and his community are the calm waves that rock you gently to sleep, the cool water lapping at your feet as you stand on the beach, watching the sun set and the breeze, carrying the ocean's scent, the wind caressing your face as you smile and remember a cherished past (that's an extract from his poem to Bambina - he is a soft man with a gentle heart).
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The barkeeper™. Has a bar on Mallorca but it is classy. About two germans in there who came to Mallorca bc a business trip, everyone else just Catalans who complain about them germans (the germans in the bar complain as well - fucking great). Makes vids where he shows you how to make ur drinks frigging awesome with minimum effort. Has lots of product placements with companies like FritzCola where he basically uses their stuff for drinks. Has rejected some offers bc the company isn't eco-friendly or smt like this. Is chill and goes along with most things, tries to stay out of trouble. Has only an insta account, sometimes live streams gigs in his bar; is a hot tip for aspiring bands. Got involved in this mess bc Argus visited Mallorca and went to this bar and made a recommendation for it. Rufus once tried to fix the jukebox in the back of the store; Doc needed half an hour and 3/4 of his flask after that react vid. Also booked his next holidays to Mallorca to actually fix the box. Cletus recommended some of the drinks to get wasted. Gets visits by Bozo when he's sailing down there.
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Not directly group-able/too group-able people:
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Smooth networker, what's up?? Mostly has a snarky twitter account, rants with Toni about ppl not respecting women. Provides Barry with a lot of background info, mostly about Rufus but also the other two. Is very active on insta too, makes weekly posts. Comments on Rufus' vid and always is top comment. Makes elaborate schemes to prank the trash Bois but them good pranks and no one gets hurt (more than usual, at least). Is hailed as a cinnamon roll bc he smoll but actually is a sinnamon roll. Has the potential to be the voice of reason for Rufus but refuses to be bc he likes Doc's reaction to it and Gizmo's dead-eyed stare every time Rufus does something noticeably stupid. Might be the only one who could rival Ulysses as a networker but too lazy to actually get up to set up his own company.
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Depressed. Sad. Edgy. Has a well-going Tumblr account and every third ask is about whether he's doing okay??? Are you eating enough?? Have you slept today?? Do you need someone to talk to??? When Goal makes shoutouts about ppl need to take care of themselves and accept help if they're in a rough place she's looking at u Crane, srsly. Also writes literally masterpieces that explore the depth of the human's psyche and its abysses. Will be a best-seller if he ever makes it over thirty.
- Relatable song he hears everytime playing in the distance when trying to write (#VerständlichIchErwägeZuSterben): Faith Marie - Toxic Thoughts.
- has a tattoo on his left wrist hidden underneath lots of festival bracelets (how is u called in english, great Festivalarmbänder?!), tattoo's the date he turns 40; is the age he wants to reach to contemplate his life and his success and then decide how... drastic his next actions should be. Probably not what Goal means with self-care but u know, let every man seek heaven in his own fashion.
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Has no idea how he got famous and now has no idea how to proceed. Started by making summaries of Hermes' theories and translating them into normal ppl speech. Also understands what Hermes and Doc are ranting on about on Twitter. Makes schematics about Rufus' machines and how they actually should be build and does the same for Doc's projects. Built the tardis as a project, is now a working callbox that he donated to the city's university. Is a Gizmo in the making, just as the scientific version. Should probably write a book with Gizmo about lab safety and what to do in a disaster involving chemicals and stuff. Is soft but tries to stay out of all trouble. Still well-liked.
- Fav song during researches (bc he feels like a bad-ass spy when it's on): SAINT MOTEL - A Good Song Never Dies.
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Yoga instagramer. Love urself and the universe will love u. Makes inspirational posts and aesthetics, typical influencer gurl. Gets all the cash but is calm so technically worse ppl could get the fame??? Stays out of trouble, moderates comments. Maybe has a cult thing going on, maybe just an elaborate insider. Huge discourse about him on Reddit whether he actually lives by his live-and-let-live attitude or is, in fact, a capitalistic oppressor.
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No one knows whether she actually is that mad or if it's just an act. Uploads once a month on a yt channel, otherwise posts daily in her telegram group. Always talks about conspiracy theories but kinda manages to present them in a way that makes it easy to follow along? Says she doesn't encourage discourse about it in her comments but doesn't stop you if you do start one. Might be with the mafia, no one's sure. Missing an eye and two most supported theories are either that she lost it in a high stakes mission for the mafia or accidentally stabbed herself with a pencil. Supports Barry's theory that the boys are clones.
- Hollywood Undead: I don't wanna die (because it has some mafia vibes that someone with some mental problems might dig, kay?).
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Makes blogs about his life in the monastery and how to be a Christian without being a stuffy conservative (catholic). Has a vid that's 1,5 h long where he calls ppl out on their bullshit that you need to be anti-lgbtq+/anti-minorities if you want to be a good Christian. Also talks about his not-so-good years when he was an alcoholic and how his belief helped him out there and like, he gets when ppl don't believe in God but it works for him, so are we cowabunga on it?? (Uses slang absolutely wrong - it is painful and adorable to watch in equal measures).
- Ленинград/Leningrad - i_$uss (he likes how the Jesus/christian metaphores are used) (also, Leningrad just frigging slaps, okay?).
- also, because that song's beautiful and what's gonna be played at my funeral if I have any say in it: Dietrich Bonhoeffer - Von guten Mächten/ By good forces (arrangement varies from Abel Ott to newer ones).
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Sleazy businessman, no good meanie. Started a shitstorm with Rufus after Rufus used a product of Seagull's business for one of his projects and said that the whole thing could be of better quality. Caused the only time Doc agreed with Rufus because it could be of better quality. Still has a lot of followers somehow, pbly beloved by conservative boomers all around the globe. And ppl with grandpa issues. Is rumored to be responsible for an oil leak in the ocean that Gizmo called attention to but nothing can be proven, so nvm... for now. Also regualry reports everyone else bc of some copyright or "offensive joke" or shit in hopes they will be banned.
- has a "Trailerpark - Koks auf Hawaii" vibe going on / Trailerpark - Coke on Hawaii.
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